I swear, I think I have absolutely no social grace whatsoever. I'm able to make friends easy enough, but eventually I always seem to say the EXACT thing that will piss someone off, even when trying my hardest to do the polar opposite of that. The worst part, is that it always sounds like offending them was my intention from the start. Social interaction of even the most insignificant amount, is something I find to be way more complex and difficult than it should be. This doesn't really bother me too much, considering I couldn't care less of what most people think of me.
For those few people I actually do care about however, that's when it starts to swell into a much bigger issue.
Almost everyone suffers from perfect hindsight, but I suffer from a chronic over-thinking and frustration while experiencing mine. I find my self asking over and over in my mind the same questions. I end up having an internal dialogue that goes something like this:
"Whoa. That person is really mad at me. Jeez, did I say something funky? Huh, I was really trying hard not to do that. I At what point did I say something offensive or insulting? Hmm, I dunno. What was the thing I said that could have been misconstrued as something offensive or insulting? Crap, now I'll have to review what I was actually saying and figure it out."
Then, I'll probably come across what I think the problem was, but then the mental dialogue just goes downhill from there:
"Mother-puss bucket! Why the hell can't I get this crap right? One of the few people I respect is now pissed at me. I can't apologize now, they've already left and I won't see them for a while. Great. Now I have to just live with it. I should just give up human interaction entirely."
Hence why I just try not to go to very many social activities or functions. It just becomes a disastrous occasion for all who know me. The only way it gets worse, is if I'm at a party or something in which I encounter someone I know but I haven't seen in a while. That can get downright ugly, not to mention awkward. Frankly, it's a miracle I don't drink, considering this sometimes drives me to the understanding of why some people do.
For those few people I actually do care about however, that's when it starts to swell into a much bigger issue.
Almost everyone suffers from perfect hindsight, but I suffer from a chronic over-thinking and frustration while experiencing mine. I find my self asking over and over in my mind the same questions. I end up having an internal dialogue that goes something like this:
"Whoa. That person is really mad at me. Jeez, did I say something funky? Huh, I was really trying hard not to do that. I At what point did I say something offensive or insulting? Hmm, I dunno. What was the thing I said that could have been misconstrued as something offensive or insulting? Crap, now I'll have to review what I was actually saying and figure it out."
Then, I'll probably come across what I think the problem was, but then the mental dialogue just goes downhill from there:
"Mother-puss bucket! Why the hell can't I get this crap right? One of the few people I respect is now pissed at me. I can't apologize now, they've already left and I won't see them for a while. Great. Now I have to just live with it. I should just give up human interaction entirely."
Hence why I just try not to go to very many social activities or functions. It just becomes a disastrous occasion for all who know me. The only way it gets worse, is if I'm at a party or something in which I encounter someone I know but I haven't seen in a while. That can get downright ugly, not to mention awkward. Frankly, it's a miracle I don't drink, considering this sometimes drives me to the understanding of why some people do.
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